False impressions

Recently, Carlos Yulo made history by winning two gold medals at the Paris Olympics. He's the first male to win the most coveted gold not once, but twice. Every Filipino was rejoicing. It is rare to have this sense of pride, where you can truly say that you are proud to be Filipino.

However, Carlos's victory was overshadowed by controversy regarding his rift with his mom, who allegedly posted unlikely content on social media, expressing her dismay towards her son, rooting for another country’s representative, and voicing out her disapproval of Carlos's girlfriend, Chloe.

The issues escalated to the point where financial concerns were raised. The mother allegedly implied that Chloe would squander Carlos' money and that she was taking him away from his family. Carlos came to her defense, countering his mother’s statements, claiming that it was his mother who spent his money without his knowledge and that his girlfriend had her own means. The family drama continued until his mother called for a press conference.

There are mixed sentiments among the people. Some believe his mother started the conflict with her social media posts, while others think Carlos should have kept quiet because she is still his mother, and that the girlfriend should not have been in the video with Carlos because it seemed inappropriate and insincere.  

Although it may not concern me directly, the drama struck a chord with me. It felt like it reopened an old wound, as I was once in Chloe's shoes. The only difference was that, at that time, no Carlos was on my side. The supposed Carlos was torn between his love for me and his love for his family who raised and cared for him since birth. I couldn’t blame him, but I hoped he could see fairly that I was being misjudged. I hoped he would fight for me. He did, but only after he almost lost me, literally.

I’m breathing heavily while writing this and feeling a bit teary-eyed. I may not be able to share all the details, but the trauma I experienced was no joke. Looking back and seeing Chloe now, she seems to be smiling and handling it well, but I worry about how she truly feels about all this commotion. I also wonder how Chloe’s parents feel, especially when the parents of the person their daughter loves are passing judgment on her. I can’t imagine the pain they must be enduring, just as I remember the heartache my own parents felt when I was mistreated and misjudged. While I could endure the pain myself, it was unbearable to see the sadness in my parents' eyes as they witnessed me being treated unfairly and judged harshly.

Time heals, that’s for sure. Though I still can’t say that I am totally healed. A part of me is still longing for acceptance, still wondering what it would be like if there hadn’t been misjudgement. What if they had tried to get to know me better? What if I had tried harder to reach out to them, or if they had been more considerate when I was reaching out? What if they had given me a warm embrace instead of cold feet? There are still many what ifs. But now, I am focusing on what is. I’m content that I overcame that struggle and that we were able to get through that test. I’m also happy that the supposed Carlos has mended the wound and reconciled with his family, though I, in the role of Chloe, am still out of the picture. It is better that way, I guess. Much better.

For Carlos, his mom, and Chloe, I hope that, in time, your wounds will heal. Regardless of who is right or wrong, I pray that you find the courage in your hearts to be humble and understanding.

For Carlos, if you truly love Chloe, whether you are meant to be together or not, I wish for you to always be there to protect her and assure her that she is loved. That is what matters. I also hope you find the humility to forgive your family and continue to love your mother despite her shortcomings.

For Carlos' mom, I hope you find it in your heart to prioritize the well-being of your son. I pray that instead of spreading hate and harsh judgment, you spread love and consideration. Accept that not everything or everyone will align with your preferences, and even if they don't, it’s not always a bad thing. As a mother, it is  true that it's your duty to protect your son, but it is also your role to be understanding and supportive, even during difficult times. Remember that Chloe is also the daughter of another mother. Please be mindful of the words you use, as they might inflict pain on someone else’s daughter. Imagine how you would feel if your son were mistreated or misjudged. I will pray for you.

For Chloe, please stay strong. You are beautiful just as you are, and even if you have imperfections and shortcomings, that is perfectly fine. As long as what they are saying is not true, and whether they like you or not, just be yourself. You are worthy and loved.

For us, the spectators of their drama, let us wish them well and refrain from adding fuel to the fire. Let us pray for their healing and hope that their wounds will mend.

In our own lives, with the people we encounter or meet, let us take the time to truly get to know them. Be considerate and kind. Let us be mindful not to hurt others or inflict pain just because of false impressions.